Reflection (written June 1, 2012)

I look in the mirror and what do I see?

A girl not pretty, but ugly

and plain as can be.

I wish I was taller or shorter

thinner or toned

stick-like or muscular

or satisfied

with the body I own.

I wish the world didn’t see me

as the freckles on my face,

the amount of melanin in my skin

that I try to erase

by scrubbing my flesh

Red Raw.

I want to see Change

anything and everything Changed

but no matter what I do

I can never be You

I’ll never be “it” or “in”

never fit this day’s definition of “thin”

So why do I try?

trapped in a  modern world’s Model-sized cage

so tight I can’t move,

I just cry.

All I want to do is survive

or die.

I look in the mirror and what do I see?

a Reflection.

But not mine,

just a world of girls

hurting like me

Yes, that is what I see

everyone wants to look like “Her”

but they feel like Me.